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Smorgasbored!

To celebrate hitting 3,000 followers on my waste-of-time gamewtfs tumblr account, and because I felt like it, welcome to a zany SNES photoshop/running gag-a-palooza*
*: Photoshop may or may not really mean, "MS Paint"
Yes, prepare yourself for...
FAMILY KOMBAT!
Today we've got two families whose bitter rivalry dates back to one of them killing the other (who was then ressurrected as a vengeful revnant)...oh, and did I mention they're both ninja-families who wear florescent highlights on their stealth-ninja-garb? Welcome if you please --
the Scorpions and the Subzeros!
Ok, Question 1: Name something that people get dismissed from.

Anyone? Something that people get dismissed from?
Ah, very good - the Subzero Family rung in!
Ok, for control of the board: something that people get dismissed from:
"NINJA CLAN"
BZZZZZT.
Oh, sorry Mr. Subzero! That wasn't one of our survey answers.
Mr. Scorpion -- you have a chance to steal the question if YOU can name something that people get dismissed from?
"MORTAL KOMBAT"
Uh, ok -- did our survied people say that you can get dismissed from..."MORTAL KOMBAT"?
Oh, it doesn't look like that rung any bells, either!
Ok, with our scores all tied up, let's move on to Question 2!
Alright, we've got Mrs. Scorpion and Uncle Subzero for Question 2
-- and Question 2 is, "Name something you do on Tiptoe."
Something you do on Tip-Toe, on the tip of your toes. Anyone?
Ah, Mrs. Scorpion has rung in...what's your answer?
"FLING BIO-ENGINEERED SPEAR"
Ok, do our surveyed audience members stand on tiptoe to..."fling bio-engineered spears?"
Oh, dear -- well, a very close game so far...
Oh, and Uncle Subzero has an answer -- what do YOU do on tiptoe?
"RIP SPINES OUT"
Ummm....judges?
Oh, it looks like it's another miss -- not a lot of spines being ripped out on tip-toe in this audience.
Well, let's welcome our next two family members and move on to Question 3, which is...
Give me a magazine with a one word name.
Yup, any magazine, as long as it's name only has ONE word in it. Ah, Cousin Subzero? Go for it!
"FREEZING PEOPLE"
Ah, close, very close -- sadly that's TWO words, so even if there was a magazine called that, it wouldn't qualify.
Scorpion Junior, can you know a magazine with a one-word title?
"GETOVERHERE"
Oh, a very competative try, that one -- it IS a one-word...uh, or, rather, a series of words crammed together without spaces...but unfortunately our studio audience didn't answer our survey with a magazine by that name.
Finally, question 4 -- for control of the board, it is...
Name a kind of tube. Ms. Scorpion, Ms. Subzero? A kind of tube?
"INNER EARTH WARP BALL"
Oh, I'm sorry -- none of our survey responders chose "INNER EARTH WARP BALL" as a kind of tube --
Now, let's go to our Fast Money Round dollar totals!
The Scorpion family, for sitting out that last question, will be playing for $5,000!
And the Subzeros, for that risky last guess, will only be playing for $1,000!
Now, let's start the Fast Money round, where we'll try to guess ALL the answers on the board...
Out of 100 people surveyed, the top 8 answers are on the board;
100 people surveyed, they were all asked THIS question:
Name a place where you'd be sure to find a pay phone.
Yes, the Subzero family rung in -- where would YOU be sure to find a pay phone?
"OUTWORD"
Alright, what did the survey say -- show me, "OUTWORD"!
Oh, tough break -- "Outword" was not in the top 8.
Mr. Scorpion, a chance to steal it -- you can take control with any answer on the board, any place you'd be SURE to find a payphone --
"NOT OUTWORLD"
BZZZZZZT!
Well, never mind, never mind --
Mrs. Scorpion and Uncle Subzero, you're up again -- and the question is the same; where's a place you'd be sure of finding that pay phone?
Uncle Subzero has rung in, go for it!
"STRIKER'S LAMEASS LEVEL"
Uh, ok...show me..."STRIKER'S LAMEASS LEVEL!"
* DING DING DING DING! *
Uh, that's right! 13 people surveyed said we'd find a pay phone in...um, a SHOPPING CENTER!
The Subzero family now has control of the board -- let's see if they can rack up some more points!
Ok, Uncle Subzero -- can YOU name another place we'd be sure to find a pay phone?
"SHAO KHAN'S TEMPLE"
Show me...SHAO KHAN'S TEMPLE!
Uh...yes! Our survey said you'd be sure to find a pay phone in "A HOTEL!"
You know what? What the hell -- here, take $1,000 and get out of here.
Honestly, this is worse than when The Million Dollar Pyramid featured that guy with a giant triangular metal mask over his head...
— carlmarksguy, 2016-06-27
1
Laytruce
If anyone's confused: the game accepted Striker's Lameass Level because it has the letters 'MALL' in them, in order (strikers laMeAss LeveL). sHaO khans TEmpLe has HOTEL in it. This game's parser is really weird.
2
Wow, that's cool to know. Weird, I'm not sure how I'd try to make an answer-parser (I guess I'd probably focus on synonyms), but I sure wouldn't do it that way :)
3
Laytruce
AFAIK, this is the only game that does it this way, for obvious reasons. I suppose they wanted to be lenient with typo's, but then got lazy. There's a TAS of this game by HeIsAnEvilGenius that goes nuts with the parser. It makes the game accept the craziest answers. Definitely worth a view.
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