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Cover Art Theatre

Today we'll start a multi-week Sports-Tacular, looking at an unlicensed multi-cart game from...
Code Masters!
ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT!
Yes, it's a multi-cart game; but not just a series of bootlegged copies of real games. No, they've made themselves a menu of festive and exciting sports offerings that...well, honestly, they're actually no worse than most NES minigame compiliations. For example, World Games gave us an immensely shallower, more frustrating and less rewarding gameplay experience and it got the NES seal of quality.
That being said, let's bask in the glow of their cover-art!
Four unlicensed games in one shiny gold cartridge! But (like the multi-game cartride experience itself), this image is too rich to consume all at once. Let's analyze at each game's imagry!
Baseball Pro's
This patriotic tableau of America's National Passtime becomes unsettling on closer examination:
evidently the fielding team has put a humungous man in as their pitcher, and the batter has expressed his disapproval at trying to hit a ball the size of his head by rushing the mound and swinging directly for his opponent's torso.
(Or, on reflection -- they might have just done an odd picture-in-picture overlap of the two players)
Soccer Simulator
Evidently three pictures of soccer players have been loosely cut out and pasted together to create this image. Who did this pre-photoshop work? We can only assume the cryptic duo who appear in the background: none other than Roy Orbison and, unless I'm greatly mistaken, Saddam Hussein (seen here delivering a saucy "around the world" snap of his fingers)!
Pro Tennis Simulator
Hmmm; bouffant hair, green and foggy background, a protagonist poised to strike as a lens-flair fires off the object he's swinging with both hands? Preeeeetty sure a few minutes in photoshop could turn this into the cover of a fantasy RPG. What do you say, Roy 'n Sadam?
Also: LACOS
BMX Simulator
It's 11:16 and these two BMX bicycle-riders are locked in a life-or-death-or-skinning-their-knee struggle for superiority!
Their heads are encased in plastic and metal worthy of a Sith Lord, and they're wearing racing uniforms gaudy enough to do any high school's marching band proud. Take THAT, ExciteBike!
Well, that was all in good fun.
and NEXT week? We'll actually get to the game's menu!
— carlmarksguy, 2016-03-21
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